he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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