and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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