So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
