Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Randomize
