STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
