remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
