I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
