i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
Randomize
