just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
