Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
