break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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