Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
