Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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