Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
