Its about making memories worth repressing
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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