maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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