so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize