He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
