I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Send help, water and tortillas.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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