he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
