Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize