I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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