Can Purell be used as lube?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
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