Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
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