Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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