clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
