I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
