He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
