I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
