I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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