that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
The air taste purple.
Randomize
