addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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