so explain again why im purple
no
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
