At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
