I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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