Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
