i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
