Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
