butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
