so that wasnt chicken after all
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize