you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
