Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
