Rock
Scissors
Fuck
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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