I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We have so much sex to catch up on
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
