she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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