If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
