are you so shy because you have an std?
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
