Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
