you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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