i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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