If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
