It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize