If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize